Say what you need to say
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During that ensuing time I also cultivated a "TMI" approach to others whereby I said too much or made things known that others didn't really care to hear. Far be it from me to overcompensate ... but I feel this is the result of those previous failures to communicate — and speak my heart when I really should have but for one reason or another didn't. Luckily some of that which was said was done so with actions which on occasion are known to speak louder. But still it would have been nice to say "I love you" to a few more people than have heard it from me.
That sadness for those failures which punctuate my soul are a constant reminder of that which should have been done never happening. All I can really do is remember those no longer around me and try to meld something more from that silence which was. To fill that silence with something which is meaningful ... and to mark those mistakes I made so many times.
Say
Take all of your wasted honor
Every little past frustration
Take all of your so-called problems,
Better put 'em in quotations
Say what you need to say ...
Walking like a one man army
Fighting with the shadows in your head
Living out the same old moment
Knowing you'd be better off instead,
If you could only ...
Say what you need to say ...
Have no fear for giving in
Have no fear for giving over
You'd better know that in the end
It's better to say too much
Than never to say what you need to say again
Even if your hands are shaking
And your faith is broken
Even as the eyes are closing
Do it with a heart wide open (a wide heart)
Say what you need to say ...
John Mayer
The Bucket List soundtrack
Aware, Columbia
November 20, 2007