2022-02-05

National Fart Day 2022

    Karen Griffin farts on Peter
Well, I hate to admit this but I have my gassy moments.

The character of these episodes range from explosive outgassing, silent but deadly, loud but harmless, the occasional whiny squeaker, and even the rare shart; which is a later development in my evolution.

I have never been one to comply with any norms of behavior imposed by others upon me.

Actually, I used to until I realized that the vast number of those in my midst are stupid — even with advanced degrees.

Inasmuch as that evidence is overwhelming at this miserable political juncture; I now would just as soon fart on you as look at you.

I don't laugh and try to blame it on you in an elevator — I just admit it and depart to leave you marinating in the methane from my hot burn ass emission.

Since 2008, National Fart Day has been held each February 5.

The main purpose of the day to provide release without consideration of etiquette and those other interpersonal niceties our chief executive chose to disregard as he farted in the presence of Camilla Parker Bowles ... of ALL people.

Then he turned around and pooped in the presence of the pope.

So flatulence is the very least of our worries in the world of woke idiots, cancel culture slobs, BLM marxist fakers out to rob the nation, and antifa subversives out to destroy us all and affix the blame on others.

Stupid democrats and progressives are a highly appropriate reason to participate in National Fart Day.

Go fart on a democrat or progressive each and every time you have a notion.